I was writing a book..and this girl threatened to beat me if I didn't finish it...

("...wrong motivation entirely, all you have to do now is just post about that which you feel is worth posting about, the rest will come from there then..." said the goblin)

I just wish that I could close my eyes and then open them and maybe things could be the way they were before....when everything was alright...

"...unfortunately as life goes on, those eyes grow wider still, but it's a trade off, a new awareness for ones previous innocence, but one can never go back to that innocence again, I mean one can't unknow something once one know it for sure..." mentioned the goblin, adding "...actually, I like what you are writing as it is, don't try to be otherwise now..."

Hey Girl, I'm hoping that you are feeling better. I enjoyed chatting with you the other evening. I'm sorry that I had to leave when we had just gotten acquainted. I knew that it would be difficult for me to get up at 6:00am when it was already after 1:00am. I had to have blood work done and refill my meds. Where they took the blood out I have an awful blood pool under the skin. I know, too much info. sorry.

May I ask if your signature comments contain the answer? I'm a firm believer that one's path is set in motion before you ever start the journey. All things happen for a reason. May be hard to accept, get up and take another go at it ... but, I've found out from experience that it's better to take the gentle nudge of caution rather than experience the hard cold truth by ignoring it. Please don't be offended by my comments. After all, I have your best interest at heart.

Bethany you seem in a better mood...Please do not say things like you have lost imspiration...I love you like my sister Bethany...You and Rebecca are my only real family and it hurts when you are sad...Please I love you...

"Dearest I shall tell you only what i know I do. Take something with you, a sketch book, a camera, a note pad, something of the sort and walk away from civilization. Hide in a forest, by a creak, a lake, slip away into your own world. Take photos, write out what you see, you feel, draw it. then, from that you will find some hidden insperation."

"...I remember this point too fairy, it's as if one actually needs this wilderness period for ones writing now, and then suddenly one finds oneself through it, and it wasn't the end at all, ones writing is renewed, one is writing, yes, but not for someone else as before, nor for something either, just merely for oneself now..." said the goblin, adding "...I wouldn't be here if I didn't believe in you, you just have to go through this, that's all..."

I am so stupid... I believe in people and trust them too easily and it crushes me when I trusted them with all I had! They know who they are... I can't believe I am really that stupid! This is so fucked up to the highest point you can't imagine...

"...if it is not you, you can't blame others for your giving up, that is what you yourself wrote in your first post on this thread, is it not..." replied the goblin now, "...simply, that's is all that is important here, that is, if it is you, continue then, whereas if you are doing it for others, stop, because you mustn't write for others, that is deception and your real writing will suffer for it, so the next thing you write must be for yourself or not all, but I will help you in any way I can, did I not promise that before somewhere..."

I'm not deleting my account but I am leaving the site... I won't be here to get on and where I'm going computer access isn't allowed... All of you just need to forget me, okay?

Hey Girl! I hope you're feeling better. Then you can get up and kick someone's 4$$ if they need it or give them a big kiss. I know, I'm a nutjob.